We can donate money, or send aid, or volunteer at a shelter, but the first thing we must do is take responsibility and stock of our own path of consciousness. If we come into harmony with ourselves and vibrate from that out into the world, we are the de facto change. Panache Desai
Seeing the world for what it is and not what it could be is so hard.
Everyday I have a wrestling match with the forces of negativity- the criticisms-what should be. I strive to see the best in others, in things, in experiences. But I have been cursed with seeing myself and others on the scale of potential. Potential is a brutal measure, because it can never be fully satisfied.
How do I address the dissatisfaction I have with myself and the world in a positive manner?
We all have so many excuses to be negative. But we have to change our perspective to change things. You know about the study of recent lottery winners and recently inflicted parapalegics. One year after their life defining events, both groups had the same levels of happiness! It's perspective.
How will the next opportunity or challenge define our lives? Perspective is everything!
Perhaps the biggest challenge I face is being positive, seeing the positive, and surrendering to the positive. I do not mean be happy, or perky, or a purveyor of phony smiles. Nothing is more irritating than people who say rehearsed positive things. We all work with and know people who try to be Patty Positive.
Not only talking about gratitude, optimism or guilt either. Although these are powerful forces of life. No, I am speaking of perspective, a positive lens. We rarely see the whole picture. And rarely see the good before us. We zoom in on our targets. We tend to skip over the strengths and focus on the weaknesses.
We see inadequacy before we see virtue. We see the weeds in the rose garden.
We all like good gossip. To hear about the foibles of others. Schadenfreude. We like House of Cards, Scandal, and Orange is the New Black. Negative settings entertain us. We are all critics. Foodies, and Filmies. We have developed more sophisticated tastes where there are winners and losers. American Idol, AGT, and the Voice have taught us how to hit the buzzer.
So we are all looking for the rare talent and the OMG. And when disappointed we engage our razor ribbon tongues to slice and dice with the best of them.
We know that acknowledging the positive is good. It makes us feel good, it makes others feel good. Not pollyannish disingenuous sycophantic babble, but authentic recognition of the good and the positive.
My mother taught me that there is good in everything. That there is bad in everything. How do you appreciate the good?
Yes, let's make lemonade but also appreciate the lemons.
I truly appreciate what people do for me, how they support me. I do appreciate the care they take and the details of what they do. But I do not always acknowledge it.
It is well accepted that negative thoughts and anxiety can make us ill. Stress — the belief that we are at risk — triggers physiological pathways such as the “fight-or-flight” response, mediated by the sympathetic nervous system. These have evolved to protect us from danger, but if switched on long-term they increase the risk of conditions such as diabetes and dementia. People who see themselves in a more positive light than others see them — have lower cardiovascular responses to stress and recover faster, as well as lower baseline cortisol levels. Jo Marchant
10 steps I am trying to take to become more positive:
- Quiet the mind to see and feel. Become more mindful.
- Don't react until I have a deeper understanding.
- Listen like it matters.
- Catch people doing good!
- Start all sentences with the good I see and feel.
- If you have something nice to say, SAY IT! Don't wait for a better time.
- Always connect to something bigger than me. Purpose makes me positive.
- Always give without expectation.
- See the possibility as well as the problem.
- Shed people who are negative. Strengthen my positive network.
I love the concept of Positive Psychology: Understanding what makes us happy versus studying what screws us up.
In the book Far from the Tree , Andrew Solomon opens our eyes to see ability and uniqueness where we have labeled disability.
Let's acknowledge the wow before the woe.
I feel my growing awareness will help me. Like all bad habits it is a step process. Small steps and bigger strides. Lead with the positive.
I am positive I am going to be more positive.
It’s about your worth. Your self-worth… You — and only you — can ultimately put the price tag on that. Your tag reveals not only how you value yourself, but how imaginative and original you are about valuing others. In my experience, happier people are people who have not only a high price tag on themselves, but a high price tag on the people around them — and the tags don’t necessarily have to do with market value. They have to do with all the sense that adds up to human value. Anna Deveare Smith
Being positive resonates, vibrates, and influences the world around us.
What will you do to strengthen your positivity and your positive network?
Thanks for your positivity. John